Kyle Green

Essays: Bound By Love

Tomas Hardin, the 9th of 11 children from a poor, violent family, was shaken as a three month old, causing blindness and brain damage. Relegated to a state institution, he was put into the foster care system, where he stayed for 6 years before he was adopted by Zina Hardin. Tomas was unable to talk or walk, confined to a wheelchair and staring at a blank wall when Zina first saw him at the state foster care facility. Zina adopted Tomas into her home which included a down syndrome sister and a ADHD younger brother. Tomas has since thrived in the Hardin home, he now walks and eats on his own, and is attending a specialized school where learns life skills. "I had three wishes for Tomas when I adopted him", Zina said, "For him to walk by himself, for him to be able to drink from a straw, and for him to one day become Governor of New York".

Tomas Hardin, the 9th of 11 children from a poor, violent family, was shaken as a three month old, causing blindness and brain damage. Relegated to a state institution, he was put into the foster care system, where he stayed for 6 years before he was adopted by Zina Hardin. Tomas was unable to talk or walk, confined to a wheelchair and staring at a blank wall when Zina first saw him at the state foster care facility. Zina adopted Tomas into her home which included a down syndrome sister and a ADHD younger brother. Tomas has since thrived in the Hardin home, he now walks and eats on his own, and is attending a specialized school where learns life skills. "I had three wishes for Tomas when I adopted him", Zina said, "For him to walk by himself, for him to be able to drink from a straw, and for him to one day become Governor of New York".
   
Purnella Hardin, Tomas's 28 year old down syndrome sister, holds his head in her hands. Tomas has moments of frustration, and finds solace in his sister. Prunella and Tomas share a special bond they spend most of their time at home together. Whenever Tomas get upset or needs comforting, Prunella snaps her fingers over and over again, calling Tomas to her, and holds him until he settles down.
   
Purnella Hardin, Tomas's 28 year old down syndrome sister, tells him to get off of her bed. Tomas has moments of frustration, and finds solace in his sister. Prunella and Tomas share a special bond they spend most of their time at home together. Whenever Tomas get upset or needs comforting, Prunella snaps her fingers over and over again, calling Tomas to her, and holds him until he settles down.
     
  
Zina Hardin extends a hand to touch Tomas as he gets in her car after a day at Andrew Lewis Middle School in Salem, Virginia. Tomas is legally blind, and the sensation of touch is the way he most often communicates with the world around him.
   
Zina Hardin walks Tomas (wearing a helmet to protect his head as he rides the bus) to his school bus in the morning. Andrew Lewis Middle School provides Tomas with an individual teacher, Darell "Squeaky" Valentine, who specializes in children with multiple disabilities. Tomas goes through extensive physical, mental and vision therapy while at the school.
   
Tomas extends a hand to touch water running from a bathroom faucet. Tomas is legally blind, and the sensation of touch is the way he most often communicates with the world around him. Zina said that this was Tomas's favorite time of day, and that he will often sit and let the water run over his hands for a half hour or more.
     
  
Zina Hardin brushes Tomas's teeth during their nightly bedtime routine. Tomas thrives on routine, and everynight is pretty much the same. Zina has helped feed, bathe, clothe, and put Tomas to bed every day for 6 years. "You are my sweet little man", Zina whispers to Tomas as she is getting him ready, "I love you so much. I don't know what I would do if you weren't in my life".
  
Zina Hardin starts her daily routine of cleaning Tomas and changing his diapers. The brain injury suffered by Tomas because he was shaken caused him to become developementally delayed. When Zina first adopted Tomas, he couldn't walk, talk or eat by himself. Zina would have to give him daily enemas to help him go to the bathroom. Tomas can now walk, feed himself, and says a few rudimentary words, but still is unable to control his bowels.
   
Tomas stops and dances with Squeaky in the hallway of the Hotel Roanoke, while the two were on a class trip to see the Christmas displays at the hotel. "I try to push Tomas", Squeaky said, "He has a lot more progressing to do, and I know he is capable of it...he just needs someone to help lead the way".
     
  
Darell "Squeaky" Valentine, a multiple handicapped therapy and instructional teacher at Andrew Lewis Middle School, shows Tomas his reflection in the mirror. Zina credits Squeaky for Tomas's progress over the last few years. Squeaky is the only male influence in Tomas's life, and he and Tomas have a very close relationship.
   
Squeaky caresses Tomas's head after he had to stop and sit down for a rest in the hallway of the Hotel Roanoke, while the two were on a class trip to see the Christmas displays at the hotel. Tomas can walk without assistance, however, he gets tired easily, and has to stop often if his class is on an extended field trip. The scar on Tomas's head is from surgery for hydrocephalus, which was caused when he was shaken as a baby.
   
Darell "Squeaky" Valentine, a multiple handicapped therapy and instructional teacher at Andrew Lewis Middle School, leads Tomas down a hallway at Hotel Roanoke. Zina credits Squeaky for Tomas's progress over the last few years. Squeaky is the only male influence in Tomas's life, and he and Tomas have a very close relationship.
     
  
Zina Hardin, hugs her adopted son, Tomas before he leaves for a day of school. Tomas has since thrived in the Hardin home, he now walks and eats on his own, and is attending a specialized school where learns life skills. "I had three wishes for Tomas when I adopted him", Zina said, "For him to walk by himself, for him to be able to drink from a straw, and for him to one day become Governor of New York".
   
Tomas plays in his bed before he goes to sleep. Although Tomas has progressed both physically and mentally the last few years, he will always need to be taken care of. A few moments of anger when he was three months old took away the promise of his future. Luckily Tomas found a mother and family who had room in their hearts to care for and nurture him.